Sunday, August 5, 2012

The Commoner Watches the Olympics


Some years I love the Olympics, some years I hardly pay attention.  This year I'll say I'm paying attention but not sure if I love them.

I've often said that I really liked the Winter Olympics because they were so different.  Not every one skis, or skates.  Most people never go on a snow mobile or bobsled.

But its fair to say that everyone has-at one point in their life, run, jumped in a pool, rode a bicycle, swam, or did a cart wheel.  That makes the summer Olympics the commoner's games-sort of. 

But I have some observations from the Olympic Games like only a commoner could.

Swimmers are commoners.  They have to spend all day swimming back and forth in a pool and no one gives them a towel.  I don't think that's easy. It makes me cold  just watching them.  They don't even get to float on anything just swim, back and forth, hour after hour.  

Gymnast ARE NOT commoners.  Dare I say this?  I can tell you this because I have met elite gymnasts when I was an almost elite cyclists at many a festival.  They walk around with their noses in the air all of the time-they are the cool girls from high school. Plus it cost a lot of money to be a gymnast. 

Runners are commoners.  It's a lot of work to be a runner.  The training is exhausting, the special diets, and the starters position and pistol is especially scary-it must make them jumpy.  They are working through running injuries and must get tired, they have to.

Any event with a horse or a boat is not a sport for a commoner.  The baggage fees to bring that equipment with you are prohibitive. Plus?  Horses and boats? I don't own either.   In fact the  very fact that a member of the royal family Zara Phillips (not related to me) competes tells you this is no place for a commoner. If you're not from Old Westbury don't bother.

Beach volley ball is definitely a commoner's sports.  Who hasn't played this sport?  Party music, bikinis, margaritas, a spanish ole horn in the background?  I can't wait for Rio to host this event.  Plus no shoes!  Commoner's sport

Diving?  Commoner's sport.  All you need is a pool with a diving board.  I never grew up with one but I knew people who did, and everyone around here has one.  Commoner!

Weightlifting?  Commoner-I do this in my gym all the time.

Cycling-oh cycling.  This was my sport back in the day. Dare I say that this has crossed the line from commoner sport when I was a cyclist-to Not a commoner's sport.  The very price of those cute outfits and snazzy bikes pretty much puts it out of the reach of the common bike rider.

Now I'm really competitive-I've told you all this, and I'm watching and saying you know-I want to go to the Olympics, come on-why not-and you know there are some sports I know I can still be competitive at.

Anything you can do at a picnic is something I can compete at.  Archery for instance-my age and maturity would do me well there.  They wear great outfits and really cute hats.  I loved their uniforms.

Shooting-I'm sure I would be good at that-no need to be young and spry.  I heard there's a woman who's 8 months pregnant in that event.  

What about ping pong.  My strategy would be stand still and stick out the paddle.  It might work.

I'm pulling for bocci to become a sport-or dodgeball-how about Steal the Bacon.

In the meantime I dare say this-most of those who were commoners before the Olympics can not be called commoner's after.  They have been lifted above the ordinary. They've experienced something the ordinary can not.

Now really -the question I've asked all week?  Why do the swimmers not use towels?

Let the games continue....