The Commoner Buys New Running Shoes

 

I reached a milestone last week.  One I waited for a long time to make.  What is it you wonder?  A weight goal am I 120 pounds yet?  A 50th birthday?  A special anniversary?  A million on Bejeweled?  Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong.  It was 300 miles on my running shoes which meant it was time for a new pair! HURRAY

So off we went to Running Revolution in Campbell.  A fancy shmancy running store where they fit you for your shoes and then they sell them to you.  I'm so excited that I can't wait.  My one stipulation was that I had to have Nike's because I sponsor them remember?

So we walk in the door and it's really cool.  Running things everywhere, hats, shoes, watches, tops, bottoms, socks....everything you could imagine.  But wait-we were here for shoes and the first step was the dog machine thing. 

Now one thing you probably don't know about me is that I'm really short-5'4".  Which isn't a big deal on its own.  The big deal is that no one ever believes that.  Besides the fact that I almost always wear a heel, I  also have hands and feet the size of a 6'5"  NBA player.  I'm not kidding.  I should be at least 6' to carry off this part of my anatomy.  

It's been this way since the 8th grade, and most people aren't really aware of it because I never play up my feet with fancy shoes or pedicures.  

That's an important part of the story  because the first thing that they did at Running Revolution is fit my feet.  In one of those silver things like I used to use at Buster Brown when I was 4. 

So it was no surprise when the hipster runner guy pronounced a number and width only produced for women giants.  I was unperturbed by this fact and moved on to the next portion of the 'fitting'.

I put my feet in some really cool goo thing -like those gymnast mats.  Ooh hipster runner tells me-you have a high arch.  That makes a high arch, wide, and amazonian.  Please step on the tread mill we want to see your running stride-BAREFOOT.

So I step on and I plug something to my shirt or something and I start running barefoot, on a treadmill, in a store, in my street clothes.  I do this for about a minute-which felt like a century and then I was told to get off -without breaking my face.

Well turns out I run like a duck.  Feet (super large feet) pointing out, high arches, ankles flexing on landing, like they were going to snap.   I need stability shoes, here are your 71 dollar insoles (no obligation) move over to Kim she'll find your shoes.

Well to make a long story short-Kim came out with a pile of like size men shoes because apparently my shoe size is so rare in a women's cut.  I wasn't having any of that or my new shoe size.  I said thanks for everything and marched down to Sport's Authority, where I got the Nike I wanted in the size I wear at a great price.

I could hear them whisper as I left the store,  "There goes the short girl with the HUGE feet in a size we don't carry."